Becoming

With the turn to 2026, I have been thinking a lot about Becoming. How we tend to be in a constant state of it. Becoming our best selves, becoming healthier, becoming insert thing we are striving for here. 

I think back to childhood when I was trying to become the person that others would love. Pay attention to. And to my romantic relationships where I would become a version of me I thought they wanted. Typically that meant becoming a sad copycat of them. I would shapeshift and contort hoping they would just love me a little longer. Maybe even forever.

It’s wild to look back on all we will do to keep a firm grasp on what we want. The irony of it being that all we needed to do was loosen the grip and be ourselves. But who the hell are we when we are in the becoming years? Part of the act we put on is in trying to figure out who we are at our core. Some are nurtured from an early age to know who they are and stand in that. Others find it in early adulthood. Some never get there.

For me it took longer than I would have liked and a near death experience to finally push me to the edge of  the people pleasing cliff. Not over it. That would take longer still. 

Over the past few years, I have really grounded in myself. I have found so much comfort in being authentic and building relationships with people who love the real me. Sure. I’d love to be someone who loves to work out and eat super healthy all the time but that’s just not who I am. And that’s ok. I’m blunt but it is almost always from a place of love. I am a loud maximalist who loves color and a house full of curated finds. Our walls are covered in art well beyond “gallery wall”. I find joy in experiences that aren’t “cool”. Although I tend to think most of us are this way. The social media overlord has stolen the joy of sharing dorky things.

I want a world where everyone stops becoming an aesthetic. Stops becoming curated. Stops becoming a carbon copy of itself. Stops becoming a trend. I want more becoming empathetic, becoming anti-rascist, becoming anti-individualist, becoming anti-genecide. More becoming community. This list could go on.

I love becoming someone who is free and wild. Who does things I’m not great at. Who is curious and hungers for new adventures. Who is comfortable in my own skin and comfortable alone and in silence with others. The more I let go of the expectations others have placed on me (and the ones I’ve placed on myself) the more I realize that when you peel it all away…I have become who I always was.